How to Be the Right Person

The traits we wish to have in another, should be the traits we exhibit in ourselves, and a lot of this requires self-introspection and understanding of our true needs and expectations.

Sometimes we seek to fill a void, and often times this leaves us even more empty and confused if we don't fill the void properly.

We can sometimes seek to fill our needs with temporary happiness, through materialistic or tangible things; but we should really fill it with what we truly need.

Our pressing needs can range from not feeling loved, feeling lonely, an ache for love, for connection, for happiness, and various other feelings.

A girl I know, Scarlet, once told me she was aching for that feeling of connection and love from another person. Her schedule was busy and her job often didn't allow much time for building connections. Once she joined a group that focused on her hobby of reading, she met other close friends who fulfilled that need of connection, and she no longer sought out attention from guys to try and prove her worth. We met at that group, and developed a deep friendship connection that goes beyond superficiality, and fulfilled a need we both were deeply desiring.

It's this line when we see these voids in our life, and learn to fill them fully and properly, which is when we can be our best for the right person and relationship. When we don't fill them properly, we can get snappy, our moods change, and this can really scare someone off because they can't fully trust.

How to recognize and fill these voids:
1. Take time away from dating and relationships for a little bit to allow time for yourself and time to do things you love doing.
2. Be kind and gentle with yourself while understanding what need it is you're trying to fill
3. Respect yourself and know how worthy you are as a person; you are valuable, and have so much to offer the world. Don't let anyone tell or make you feel otherwise.

When you do these things, you will be able to prepare yourself to be the right person for the kind of person you are seeking, to have the most healthy relationship.